Traveling & Backpacking with a Baby or Infant: Opening New Doors – The Mong New Year!

Recently I posted about how backpacking or traveling with a baby or infant can open new doors for you as you travel.  Last week we discovered that firsthand!

We went to the famous Chiang Mai Sunday Market and decided to buy Akiva a special outfit for us to dress him up in on Purim.  We hunted around and eventually chose one, a traditional outfit worn by the Hmong (or Mong) hill tribe of Northern Thailand.

Ben with Akiva and his Mong Hat. If we hadn't stopped to buy Akiva a Mong outfit, we would never have learned about the Mong New Year. Traveling with a baby is a great conversation starter!

While I was busy with Akiva, Rabbi Ben got to chatting with the seller and her friends, all from a nearby Mong village in the hills.  They told him that Tuesday was the Mong New Year and there would be a big celebration.  Rabbi Ben spent the next few days finding out more and on Tuesday morning at 5 AM we left for the Mong village to celebrate the Mong New Year!

It was a fantastic experience and I plan to post more about it this week, but the most amazing thing was that we would not even have been there if it weren’t for Akiva. We would never even have heard about it!  The only other foreigners there were members of a tiny private tour group whose guide was a Mong villager.  Otherwise, there were NO tourists at all! Amazing!

By traveling and backpacking around with a baby, we had an opening for conversation and an opportunity to learn about this once-in-a-lifetime travel experience. So, if there are any parents out there wondering if backpacking with a baby will slow you down, think again! Backpacking with a baby may actually open more doors for you… Enjoy!

Parshas Bo: Teaching is the Best Way to Learn

This week, Rabbi Ben and I went to the Hill Tribe Museum in Chiang Rai, Thailand. Usually, we skip museums because after a while they all start to blend together. You forget what you saw where, if you remember any of it at all.  Museums are usually too much to take in all at once, especially when you’re seeing so many of them.  But we made an exception and visited the Hill Tribe Museum anyway.

When we visited this Mong family for Mong New Year, I had no idea what to give as a gift of thanks. At the Hill Tribe Museum I learned that string or beads (for making traditional costumes) would have been the best gift. Now I share this information with all the other tourists I meet.

The Hill Tribe Museum in Chiang Mai doesn’t have many exhibits, but I found it a great visit anyway.  In fact, I really enjoyed it because I feel like I learned a lot about the tribes and cultures of Thailand, which I might never have learned otherwise.  One of the interesting things I read was this idea: A lot of people come to Thailand to do “voluntouring” – volunteering as a way of touring the country.  But perhaps what the tribal people need is less Western people coming to teach them things and more Western people coming to learn things.

It was an interesting point. How arrogant we Westerners are to think we are doing these tribal people so much good! We come in with our English language, our jeans, and our foods and think we are helping them, when really we are just cogs in the great wheel of assimilation that quashes cultures. What we could do, instead, is to visit these tribes and learn from them – and then take that new wisdom, knowledge, and information back to our home countries and teach it to our compatriots.

Pesach (Passover) is just around the corner.  Approximately two months to go and we’re already preparing for it through a massive review of the exodus chapter in our history.  But in this week’s Torah portion, Hashem (G-d) tells us to do more than simply review the story of what happened to us in Egypt and our exodus from that terrible place. We are told to teach the story. The parsha says:

“And so that you may relate in the ears of your son and your son’s son that which I have played with (punished) Egypt, and My wonders that I placed among them. And then you will know that I am God.”

“And then you will know that I am God.”  Rabbi Boruch Leff explains that this means we have to obtain knowledge - not just belief – and that the way to do this is to teach others. Why?  Because, as the Talmud (Taanit 7a) says:

“Rabbi Chanina said: ‘I have learned much from my teachers, from my colleagues even more, but from my students I have learned the most.’”

And indeed, modern science backs this up.  As Rabbi Leff points out,

William Glasser, Ph.D., once conducted a study in which he concluded that people learn 10% of what they read, 20% of what they hear, 30% of what they see, 50% of what they see and hear, 70% of what is discussed with others, 80% of what they experience, but 95% of what they teach to others.

Now, two months before Pesach, we review the story because, when Pesach arrives, it is our obligation to teach it to others – especially our children.  And in teaching it to others, we learn it better ourselves.

So in running the Traveling Rabbi blog, we are not just hoping to share Torah and halacha with others, but also to increase our own learning.  And so, when we learn interesting things, as we have this week at the Hill Tribe Museum, during our stay with the Akha Hill Tribe in Northern Thailand, and during our celebration of the Hmong (or Mong) New Year, we will endeavor to share them with you.  In doing so, we will increase our own knowledge. Look out for those posts.

And of course, feel free to share anything you learn on the Traveling Rabbi blog with others because you will gain benefit also.  If there is anything you want to see addressed or any questions you need answered, send us a message or a comment. We love to hear from you! Let’s all continue sharing, learning, and growing!

Shabbat Shalom!

Read more on Parshas Bo: Taking Responsibility for Our Mistakes

Traveling & Backpacking with a Baby or Infant: Top 10 Reasons for your Baby to Play with the Locals (Part 3 – Mental & Emotional Benefits for Baby)

The last couple of days, I have been posting my top 10 reasons to allow your baby to play with local adults and children as you backpack or travel through a foreign country.  We’ve already gone through the benefits for mom and dad (and there are benefits for us parents, too!) and the physical benefits your baby receives. Today I’ll go through the last four points in my top ten: the mental, intellectual, and emotional benefits to your baby.

So with no further ado, here are the last four in my top ten reasons for your baby to play with the locals as you travel or backpack:

4. Play teaches impulse control

Akiva and a curious Thai girl get to know one another. What ensued was a little "dance" back and forth as each tried to figure out how best to approach the other, whether through touching, speech, or simply eye contact.

Another social benefit of allowing your baby to play with the locals as you go is that she will learn better impulse control.  Self-regulation is hard work for a baby, who is used to having the world revolve around them and mommy and daddy respond to every whim.  But playing with others means social rules and limits are automatically imposed.  The exact rules of the game, might change slightly in every culture, but the skill learned will always be the same: control yourself.  More time spent playing means a less impulsive child, teenager, and eventually adult.

3. Play helps your baby’s social development

Akiva holds hands with an Israeli girl. Through this kind of contact, both babies learn appropriate social boundaries, such as what kind of touch is appropriate (at this stage, that mostly means 'painless'), thereby improving their social skills.

Playing with others helps your child learn important skills of social interaction.  She’ll learn how to relate to others on a basic level, which transcends cultural boundaries.  In every culture, babies and children need to learn skills like taking turns, sharing, and working together. They also learn skills like empathy – no matter where in the world you are, your baby can still learn to notice another child’s feelings and responses.  These skills are crucial for their social development and the skills they gain now they will have later in life as well.  Kids that play better together become better collaborators and team players as adults – skills that will benefit your child all through her life.

There are other social benefits, too.  Play allows your child to learn how to express her emotions – both positive and negative – in a safe, creative space.  However, children find it most difficult to learn how to express the negative feelings – which are often the most powerful – and play gives them an outlet for these.  Playing with toys or role-playing with another little one gives them a chance to get it all out.

2. Play will make your baby smarter

Akiva stares at a native Thai village girl who wants to play with him. Babies are constantly observing and learning, and picking up on new details and information as they play with others.

Your baby’s brain is still growing and developing.  New cells are being formed and new links created every single day. Why not provide those links with some stimulation? Forming strong links between new brain cells ensures they stay active, improving your baby’s intelligence and memory.  Babies learn faster and form stronger links and associations by actual physical play than by watching television or a DVD.  Also, we know that as adults we learn better when we teach a skill to someone else – so why not let your baby “teach” new skills and ideas to a new friend?

Attention span and concentration are specific skills controlled by a certain area of the brain.  In today’s world of immediate gratification, constant entertainment, and ceaseless change, these areas of the brain don’t get as much stimulation and encouragement as they ought to.  However, you can encourage your baby to build these parts of her brain by giving her something to focus on that she won’t want to look away from: playing with new friends.

And… the number one reason to let your baby play with locals is…

1. Play with locals will improve your baby’s language and literacy

Babies all over the world are what I like to describe as ‘citizens of the world.’ They can discriminate all the sounds of all languages, no matter what country we’re testing and what language we’re using.
— Patricia Kuhl

Language has a critical period for learning, which means that you and I, as adults, will have a more difficult time learning new languages. (Rabbi Ben disagrees with this, but the scientific studies disagree with him.) In fact, we as adults cannot even always distinguish all the sounds in all the languages – but babies can.  Children learn language best before the age of 7, so by exposing your child(ren) to native speakers of foreign languages, you’re giving them the opportunity to learn language more easily.

And for anyone thinking of traveling with a baby and saying to themselves, “but my baby can’t even talk yet!” – don’t let this be a reason not to travel. In fact, if you’re traveling with a baby, this is the best and most important time to let your baby play with locals – especially adults.  That’s because between 6 and 12 months of age – and especially between the ages of 8 and 10 months – baby brains are being wired for language. This is the age when they learn to distinguish sounds. It’s when they learn to tell the differences between tones in language, or between “R” and “L” sounds, for example.

Eight-month-old Akiva makes friends with some Hmong hill tribe natives of Thailand. Although he has had a lot of exposure recently to Thai speakers, exposure to speakers of the Hmong language will help him to form new pathways in his brain that will enable him to hear and recognize more language sounds as he grows older.

Now, if you think you’ll teach your baby these same language skills using Baby Einstein, think again. Studies show that a baby who watches TV in a foreign language or listens to audio cassettes in a foreign language does not learn the sounds in that foreign language at all.  It takes a human being to play with and talk to the baby in a language.  So by allowing your baby to play with the locals as you travel, you are actually allowing them to rewire their brains for a second language. What an advantage to give your youngster!

And if that doesn’t convince you to let your baby play with the locals as you travel, think about this: Babies who engage in (especially sociodramatic) play use more words, string together longer sentences, and apply more complexities to their speech.  Additionally, by allowing your baby to play with others, rather than simply sitting him down in front of the iPad when you need a short break, leads to an increase in language skills (of 15%, according to studies – a significant amount). So if you weren’t convinced before, let your baby play with the locals!

Traveling & Backpacking with a Baby or Infant: Top 10 Reasons for your Baby to Play with the Locals (Part 2 – Physical Benefits for Baby)

As I mentioned yesterday, allowing your baby to play with locals (including adults, but especially children) as you travel had many benefits as you travel or backpack around. Yesterday I mentioned the first 3 reasons why allowing your child to play with locals is a benefit.  As I explained, not only does your baby benefit, but so do you, as the parent!

So here are my top ten reasons to allow your traveling or backpacking baby or infant to play with local children:

7. Play makes your baby stronger and aids in physical development

Babies at play are always moving. Even stuck in a high chair, Akiva finds a way to move around - by giving repeated high fives to an Israeli friend.

Playing requires movement.  Unlike sitting in front of the television, playing with other children can take on many forms, but they all require movement.  Even a tea party will get your child moving.  And movement has a lot of benefits.  It makes your little one physically stronger, as he uses his muscles repeatedly and in new ways, but it also lowers the risk of obesity and all its related diseases.

6. Play reduces stress

Akiva takes some time out to de-stress with an Israeli friend. Note that anything can become a good plaything - Akiva and his friend were playing with his bottle, having discarded his other, more "conventional" toys.

Travel can be stressful, not only for you, but for your baby as well.  Young babies don’t have long enough term memory to be bothered by the change of scenery, but older toddlers may experience some stress at the change in location.  This is especially true with things like sleeping arrangements.  And babies of any age are liable to suffer from overstimulation.  Even babies and toddlers who are not traveling experience stress as they learn to navigate social rules, follow adult instructions, control their impulses, and cope with separations. To make matters worse, babies pick up on their parents’ and others’ emotional states and reflect them back like little mirrors.  If you’re feeling tired, stressed, or overwhelmed, your baby is going to feel the same.  So what to do?

How you deal with stress may vary, but the best, cheapest, fastest, and easiest stress buster for your baby is play.  Play enables your baby to “escape” from the stressful situation by focusing in on something different and enjoyable. By concentrating her attention, it can also reduce the risk of overstimulation.  Plus, all that moving around burns off the cortisol that stress produces and replaces it with endorphins and other feel-good hormones.  If your baby seems out-of-sorts, take some time out of your day’s travel to play with her… or, better yet, to find her a little friend to play with!

5. Play is good for your baby’s health

Akiva plays with a Thai girl. By allowing him to sit and play on the floor with local kids, we expose him to plenty of germs, I'm sure... and yet, he almost never gets sick. Baruch Hashem, so far he has exhibit no allergies, either.

Ok, all your paranoid parents: This one’s for you. Yes, playing while you travel will actually make your baby healthier.  In fact, eating dirt, germs, bacteria, viruses, and even worms are vital to the development of a healthy immune system in your baby.  Scientists now believe that the widespread rise of diseases like multiple sclerosis, type 1 diabetes, inflammatory bowel disease, asthma, and allergies in Western countries are because we are too clean.  A baby’s body does not come pre-programmed with appropriate immune responses. Like almost everything else, from palate to preferences, your baby’s immune system needs to learn what to respond to – and what not to.  When small doses of toxins and disease agents enter your baby’s system, her body learns that these are invaders that must be attacked.  When there is nothing to attack, your baby’s immune system may in fact turn on itself and begin attacking things that are beneficial to it – such as peanuts, eggs, or its own insulin.  So let your baby get down and dirty with the local kids!

Read more in the New York Times.

The best is yet to come – tomorrow I’ll post my top 4 reasons to let your baby play with the locals! Watch this space!

Rabbi Plays Alp Horn on Swiss Air flight

My Dad cracks me up! He got the pilot’s permission on his Swiss Air flight from Israel to Montreal, to let him play a song on the alphorn on the airplane. I give my dad credit, he’s not shy!